In today's episode, I walk you through the mindset it takes to hit your goals.
You'll learn how to:
- integrate the lessons from 2022 even if you think successes were just plain luck
- become more present in your life and practice, so you can notice when your mindset is out of alignment with your goals
- make your life easier to reduce stress and anxiety
Plus, I'm introducing something brand new — a Scheduling Strategy Call — where you can get my eyes on your calendar to make 2023 that much better.
This episode will help you get your mind right, so you can confidently take action and hit your goals in 2023.
Grab your pen and notepad because this is the mindset training you need to make your goals reality.
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Thanks for listening, and I'll talk to you next week.
How to Hit Your Goals in 2023
Hello and welcome to 2023. I hope you had a fabulous new year. I got to spend some time with some friends. We actually had a power outage here in Sacramento. There was this huge storm that went through and as I was driving to my friend's house, all the electricity went out. And we spent an amazing time celebrating New Year's and my friend's living room with a crackling fire and getting to talk to everybody.
Our original plans was going to karaoke and there's no way that we would've created such a special moment like that getting to be around the fire together if we hadn't been forced <laugh> into just talking with each other and catching up. And, you know, we would've had just as many laughs but these were just, it was just so much fun and so special. So I hope you had an amazing 2023 as well ringing in the new year. Today, I wanna give you something special.
On Saturday morning I spent time with some lawyers talking about setting intention about moving through 2023 towards their goal, how to walk through the year to create that goal. What it turned into was a wonderful mindset training. It is a masterclass in how to think about your goal and how to tap in into you and your inner resources and looking at the way you think and the way you feel and beginning to think differently as you move into 2023 and you move towards your goal.
So I really wanted to share this with you because as I was listening through it, again, I was just thinking about how inspiring it was for me and I recorded it, right? But I use this material too when I am working on a goal, which I am this year too. So I want you to reap the benefit of the work that we did on Saturday morning. And I want you to listen to this episode multiple times because it is a workshop, really, it is a training. And if you are listening through once in your car, great. But come back the, the second time through and answer the questions that I pose in this episode because answers to those questions are what's gonna move the needle in your practice and in your life. So without further ado, I want to share this beautiful training with you.
Okay, so I did fib there a little bit. Without further ado, I wanna share with you why you need to be on my email list, cuz I did not share this on the podcast. It was very last minute. So if you go to dina cataldo.com/resources, you will get an option of multiple things you can download from me to get on my email list. So I highly encourage you to go to https://dinacataldo.com/resources so you always know what is coming up and what kind of trainings are gonna be available to you because this is something I didn't intend to share on the podcast, it just sounded like a fun idea for me. So I encourage you to get on my email list and that way you will be able to know what's happening and you'll, you know, get invites right away. All right, my friend. So now without further ado, here is that episode.
So as people are rolling in, I wanna just share a little story. So Thursday night I had a a fire alarm go off or something that I thought at the time was like, it's never happened before. I was sageing, which I do pretty much every day and the fire alarm went off and I thought that was so weird, like why would it be going off? And then this morning. And so I didn't want to like light anything today because I was like, okay, is the fire alarm gonna go off during our session today? And then this morning at like four 30 in the morning, I hadn't lit a thing. Fire alarm goes off again. And so of course I'm like, okay, well it's apparently not the sageing. There's something wrong with the fire alarm system. And I wanna use this as an illustration of how we might be solving for the wrong problems.
Whether it's in your law practice, whether it's in a side business, whether or not it's a relationship or whatever other goal you might have, you might be solving for the wrong problems. And so we're actually gonna be talking about this as we move through today. So just kind of keep this in mind as the problem is not always what we think the problem is. All right?
The Importance of Mornings to Hit Your Goals
Thank you for being here this morning. Okay, this is something that is incredibly important, I think's really important to us setting ourselves up for success. Whether it is the end of the year, whether it's in the middle of the year, it's important for us to evaluate where we are and where we want to go. And the words that came to me today for me to share with you during this experience are integration, presence and play. Okay? So we're gonna integrate what was was happening in our 2022.
We're gonna become more present to what might be going on in your practice, what might be going on in your mind so that you're better able to solve for the right problem. And also we're gonna talk about play has so few of us really take this into our lives, like consciously create play. I also have trouble with this, like this is something that I am continually working for. This is all play for me, okay? Like I wanted to create something intentionally that would be fun, that would be something that would be so fun for you to kick off the new year. So thank you for being here and let's have some fun. And as I'm going through this, I'm gonna be asking you questions, okay? So you might wanna have a pen and paper handy. I'm gonna be asking you questions. Have maybe your q and a open to answer these as we go.
And I won't mention your name, okay, I'll keep it anonymous. But I will address what's going on in there so that way you get the most from this session. I wanted to have this in the morning. Hey, there was something about the morning time that really called for me to do this. So if you're on the west coast, it's a little early, but I wanted to create this at a time when you know, our mind is the most quiet and receptive and maybe you start off the morning with your brain already busy and that's okay.
We can start to tame that by not checking email right away by not, you know, checking social media right away and just recognizing that this is, we can get 10 minutes of our morning without having anything going on outside of ourselves. We can be within ourselves. Like this is really mu a practice and it may not be something you do overnight, but just to start generating that presence of mind, that presence of person before the day, before the busyness kicks in.
Because when we are connected with ourselves, we have more access to the higher parts of our brain. We start to problem solve better. You know, things don't seem quite as problematic because we are more in touch with what's really important and we get to cultivate this, okay? This is something we have the opportunity to cultivate and I highly encourage you to do that if you don't already have a morning practice to just sit right? To just sit and watch your brain, it will go all over the place. And that's the good thing that you're noticing it, that's where the practice starts. And your brain is always gonna have thoughts. That's what our brain does, just like our heartbeats and we wanna calm down our brain. And the one way to to start doing that is just by noticing the craziness that happens in our brain. Like all of the random thoughts.
Our Roadmap Today to Hit Your Goals
I wanna give you a roadmap of where we're going today. Hey, we're gonna do an integration exercise, we're gonna talk intention setting, and we're also going to consciously decide how you want to move through 2023 to hit your goals. And I'm really big on goal setting because when we do it in a way that is kind to ourselves, and I'm gonna share with you what that looks like, we begin to not only hit our goals more easily, but we begin to expand our capacity to have our capacity to bring in more people into a business, our capacity to bring in more money, our capacity to bring in new clients. And that really happens when we goal set, when we focus our mind on something. And there are some keys that I'm gonna share with you today to really integrating those things into your life and doing it in a way that doesn't feel stressful or overwhelming.
Step One: List All Your Wins in 2022
So let's start with integration. Okay? So the very first thing I want you to do today, you've got your pad in front of you, you've got your pen, is I want you to list all of your wins. And if I start moving quickly through this, I'm gonna try to give some time for this and you're gonna get a replay of this. I encourage you to go through and answer every single question that I pose to you in this. Because even though we're gonna be keeping this session short, the questions I'm going to give you could be a question a day that you ask yourself, right? It could be that you sit down and you give yourself an hour to really think through some of these questions and some of them you may know off the top of your head. But the very first thing I want you to do is I want you to write down all of your wins this year.
It could be that you had more clients than ever, that you handled a difficult client with grace and compassion, that you had somebody in your life that had some health issues and you managed to keep your business running and take care of that person. You managed to be able to take care of yourself and help that other person like list all of your wins, okay?
There is No Such Thing As Luck or Flukes
Another thing I wanna share with you is that there are no flukes in your life. So if you have a something that really good that happened to you this year and you're attributing it to luck or a fluke or to some other person, you did this, you created this, is there something that happened this year that you think is luck or a fluke and that it's not repeatable? I want you to answer me in the q and a because I wanna give you some help here on recreating that experience, that amazingness for 2023.
So let me know in the q and a what comes to mind. That was just so amazing. It was just so, it was such a big success and it seemed like a fluke. And you, your brain is like, there's no way that I had anything to do with that. And I've had these things come up with clients, they've told me things like, well somebody gave me an opportunity, right? They gave me an opportunity and there's just no way I can repeat that success. Somebody referred a client to me that was especially big and there's just no way I can repeat that success I wanna share with you, no matter what you have had happen to you, like happen to you. I say as if it's like we're all at the effect of something, but that's how it really feels when we've had these really big successes and we have no idea how we created them, I want you to consider how you made it happen.
So in the case of someone giving them an opportunity, had somebody say that, nobody gave them anything, what happened was is she was actually cultivating consciously that relationship. Like she took this person out, you know, for lunch and they happened to kick off a friendship. But that wouldn't have happened unless she kept following up. And then she ended up creating this amazing result in her business thinking that it was a fluke. It wasn't a fluke. She consciously went out there, found people to connect with and it, and that's what you do as you're networking and you're growing your practice and that is what helps build your business. Okay?
So I have one person who says, “I increased my legal fee income by over $81,000 compared to last year and all I can attribute it to is my amazing staff”. That's so interesting, right? Because who picked out the staff?
Who trained the staff? You know? And if it was somebody else who trained them, who trained that person, right? It all stems back to you. Like how did you, like if you could systematize, create your success soup for that amazingness, tell me, like you could tell yourself, you don't have to tell me or you can, but like really if you focused all of your intention on and told yourself I created this, right?
If you just thought I created this, how did I create this? Okay, what were the steps?
Okay, step one, I built my business to the point where I could hire somebody. That's step one. I did such so much amazing work doing that. And then I realized what were the gaps that I had that I couldn't fill. And I thought about them and I realized that I could hire somebody and that person was somebody that I could trust.
I had to work on myself so I could trust them. I had to practice, maybe I had to hire multiple people and have some fails before I found those amazing people that I could have on my staff. And how amazing is it that I kept moving forward and I created that, right? And of course, if I don't know, know all of your staff, like maybe you have associates working for you, maybe you have paralegals and assistants, like what kind of environment are you creating for them that they want to do that kind of work, that they are able to create that for you? Help you create that, right? Because you are creating a culture in which you know they're not just slacking off. So what kind of culture are you creating? How are you consciously doing that? It might be unconscious right now, but bring it to your consciousness because you can repeat that and maybe even double it.
Like when you start getting aware of all of the things you are doing and you integrate that into what you do next year, how can you double what you did, right? How can you start asking yourself that question and you're gonna start opening yourself up to possibilities on how maybe you bring in other people, maybe how you optimize what they're doing, maybe how you, you know, look at your culture and how you keep that culture going in 2023. Okay?
I had of another person who said, “Being asked and being on six podcasts this year.” Such a great way to grow your business, to grow awareness of people, people get to know you, right?
That's why I have a podcast is cuz people get to know you. That's why I love listening to podcasts cause I feel like I know them. So how did you create that, right?
Other people might have been doing the asking, but how did you create that By being on and asking to be on other podcasts maybe before that, by showing up every day in your practice, by showing up the way you are fully, by really working on yourself so that you can be an example of what's possible and other people are seeing it and talking about you, right? Maybe you're showing up on LinkedIn, maybe you're showing up on Instagram, you know, and you are able to really show your personality and people see it and then they ask you, right? It's all what we are doing. It's important for us to bring that to our consciousness so that we can integrate it into the next year so that we can make that even bigger. We can double down on what we're doing and then begin to keep growing from there.
Tap into the Wins
I also wanna share with you, it's so important to own these wins. Like how does it feel in your body? Like dropping into your body? How does it feel to own that win, right? How does that feel? Let me know In the q and a, do you feel proud? Do you feel accomplished? It's really important to cultivate that feeling because it makes it easier for us to move into the next phase of whatever we're growing, like whatever we're doing in our goals and really cultivate that sense of accomplishment. And one of the exercises that I do be with some of my clients is I have them celebrate every single whim. Doesn't matter how big or how small I want them to do it until it feels silly. Because so often we attribute our wins to other people or we don't even acknowledge our wins at all.
And when we don't do that, we ignore all of the hard work that we've done and our brain keeps thinking to ourselves, we better work harder, we better work harder until we validate ourselves.
But if we start validating ourselves now and cultivating that sense of celebration and love for what we're doing, love for ourselves, we begin to make our lives easier. We begin taking off some of that weight of thinking that you know, it's always out there, right? Success is always away from us. Success is always, you know, at the whim of something else. Versus we are creating that success and we are able to validate ourselves and say, oh wow, that's amazing. So that might be something if you notice that this resonates with you that you wanna try on, okay, use that client exercise, celebrate every single win until it feels silly, right?
Until you're like celebrating yourself because you're like so good at taking a paperclip out, right? Like, I really want you to try this if this is something you struggle with because it can be really helpful and I've seen it happen for the people I work with.
Step Two: Setting Your Intention for Hitting Your Goals in 2023
Okay, the next phase of this I wanna talk to you about is setting an intention for 2023. I want you to think of one big goal that you have. Hey, if you want to share with me in the q and a, the more we talk about it, the more we can make it reality in our brain. So I want you to really start getting into that mindset of it's done. And one way you do that is just talk to people or your yourself. Or you can even start with me in the q and a and just say one big goal you have and say it like it's done.
So I created $200,000 in my business. Like you say it past tense, I created $200,000 in my business. How amazing is that? You did. You know you're allowed to celebrate that now, right? That you were allowed to think those thoughts. You are. And the more you do it, the more your nervous system starts to believe that it's already done. And when we feel that in our body, we just naturally start to take actions as if it's done, we start to think like the person who's already accomplished it. It's really fascinating to watch. And that's why, you know, I do this. This is something that I encourage you to do, is to really start to sink into your body the accomplishment that you've already done, right? It's already done. You're allowed to do this. There are no rules. Okay? This is, this is great. Okay, so one of you says, I created $350,000 in 2023 and I had a ball doing it.
Oh my gosh, I love that.
Yes, bring in the play, bring in the fun. So often we just don't do it. And the more we remind ourself of our intention, the more we keep our brain focused on creating it.
I became more organized and improved my time management skills. Heck yeah, heck yeah. Like just how does that feel? Hey, if it's already accomplished, it's already done. How do you feel in your body if you really tapped in? It's usually gonna be a one word answer. And a lot of times I'll hear words like accomplished, proud. Sometimes I'll hear relief. Hey, and if your answer is relief, my next follow up question for you would be what's like, where's the pressure coming from? Because if we're feeling relief, it means like we're putting pressure on ourselves. And so I, I would be really curious to know where is that pressure coming from?
What thoughts do you have that are creating pressure? And if you are feeling just like you're having a ball, you have created what you wanted to create this year, you're feeling accomplished and proud. Like what might be preventing you from feeling that right now? Like what comes up for you? Okay? And you can write this down. That's the work, right?
When you write that down and you notice what is preventing you from feeling accomplished or proud or you know, feeling playful and you notice what thoughts that you are having about your business, about your abilities. If you notice that now you can start doing that work to start cleaning it up, right? You start cleaning it up. <Laugh>, well I'm gonna have to talk about you Nancy. I'm not gonna keep you anonymous cuz you just like, you're hilarious. I talk about you all the time on the podcast.
So “I overcame my resentment of red pens and realized I was the one creating the feelings and thoughts of resentment” <laugh>. Yeah, right? Like it's those little things when we feel resentful and we don't feel like, you know, anything is going to change or you know, a lot of thoughts. I'm gonna give you some thoughts that I often see get between, you know, maybe you, right? Definitely me. I've had these experiences too, right? Get between me and experiencing that feeling of accomplishment, like following through on my intention. Like thoughts, like it's not working. I don't know what to do, I have too much to do, right?
These are thoughts that we just believe are a hundred percent true and we don't even bother questioning them. And we don't stop to say, wait a minute, what if I did know what to do? What if I guessed?
It's amazing when I ask that question to my clients and I just say, well, if you just had to guess what you would do next, they come up with all the answers. So I know that that's true for you too. So ask yourself if you did know what would you do? Or if you're thinking it's not working, start putting your brain like consciously directing your brain to well, what is working, right? Just like those flukes that we see as flukes, they're not flukes, but our brain sees them as flukes or luck. We wanna consciously direct our brain and we wanna say, oh wait a minute, there are things working. What are those things? Or, I have too much to do and just take this thought completely out of your vocabulary. Like, just don't even think this thought when you see it, just say, nope, I'm gonna figure this out.
Okay? It's so important to just be present to where these kinds of thoughts are showing up in your life. Hey, the work is uncovering these thoughts and starting to dismantle them. Start showing your brain that they're not true. No matter how much evidence your brain says there is in the world to confirm them, okay? Like you, this is the work, this is the work I do with my clients.
Recognizing these thoughts and starting to dismantle them, that is the work to create and keep reconnecting with that intention that you have for 2023.
So how do you wanna move through 2023 as you create your goal? Okay? So having a ball doing it, right? That's one thing. Like that's the intention, right? Having a ball creating $350,000 in your practice, freaking amazing. Share with me in the q and a if you'd like.
Like what do you wanna feel? What? How do you wanna move through 2023 while creating what you're creating? So for me, I thought about this and my answers are presence and play. That has really been my work, right? The presence is something I'm always going to be working on because that is what helps me see my thoughts. It helps me dismantle those thoughts that aren't serving me to hit my goals. And then the play is because I'm, I can get so focused on my work, like I love working, but if I am not generating play, I get into this mode where everything's so serious, right? Everything is life and death and you know, I feel stressed out. And so
I know that when I integrate play that I feel so much better. And I have to be really conscious about this because I could just focus and sit at my computer all day.
But what I need to do is introduce, play and introduce things like what you see behind me, right? Like all of this here is because I was like, I wanna do something fun. How do I consciously make something fun? Not just for me, but for you, right? This hat, oh my gosh, I needed this. This is like essential <laugh>. So I want you to know you can hit your goals and have some fun too. All right? So there's some questions I wanna ask you. What do you want to bring consciously into 2023? Okay, thank you Nancy. I think it's cute too. All right. What do you not feel enough in your life? Maybe it's play right? What do you, you want to feel more of? Do you wanna feel more free? Do you wanna feel more generous, more playful, more abundant? That might be your intention for 2023 and it might not feel possible right now.
And that's okay. This is a practice. You got all year to do this. And if you wanna tell me your intention, I would love to hear it.
Step Three: Consciously Deciding How You're Going to Move Through 2023 to Hit Your Goals
Okay, let's move into section three, which is consciously deciding, right? Using what you took from that last section, how you move through 2023 in the q and a. Let me know the one biggest struggle that you had in 2022. Just one, okay? And I want you to consider, just consider that this may be your biggest strength in 2023. That this was exactly what needed to happen this year. So you could create what you wanna create in 2023. I know it might seem weird right now, it might be a stretch, but that is what expansion is about, is feeling that discomfort and that kind of like your brain's like what? Brain's like what? I don't even know about that.
So think about it. This is what I see my clients struggle with the most. Compassion to themselves. Like catching your crappy thoughts, the ones that aren't serving you. And making a goal means something about you as if, if you accomplished it, then that means you're, you know, you've made it right? So those are the things I see people struggle with the most.
Compassion, compassion, compassion, compassion. This is the one thing that if I had, if I could change the world, I would just say be nice to yourself.
Don't wait to put off being nice to yourself until you hit the goal. Be nice to yourself every single moment. Stop beating yourself up. And when you watch your brain and you start getting more present to it, you might be seeing like, oh, it's telling me things like, you can't do this.
You're not capable. Why are you doing this? You shouldn't be doing this. This is too hard. Like you should be doing more. I should be, you know, doing more. I should be doing it all now. Like, watch your brain. Hey, whenever you feel shame, doubt worry. Chances are high, probably a hundred percent that you're not being nice to yourself in that moment. Notice what's going on and then ask yourself, okay, what do I need right now? That's one thing we don't do. We don't ask ourselves, what do I need? Because clearly I'm beating myself up because I think there's something I need to be doing. But what is it really that I need right now? For me, sometimes it's just like, okay, I need to have fun. Let's do something fun. It could be I need a bubble bath. I need 30 minutes of quiet time at the coffee shop.
What is it that you need? Address it. Give that to yourself.
Hey, make it happen for yourself. You're gonna find that your life becomes so much easier when you start doing this and then becoming present to what your brain is doing. So when I mentioned earlier, those 10 minutes at the very beginning of your morning are, they're fabulous. Cause that's when we're most connected with ourselves. Our brain still might be thinking all the thoughts, but just bring them in. Just notice them breathe. What is your brain thinking? Thinking about all your to-dos, thinking about how you should be working right now. Just notice your brain and then just redirect it. Like, oh wait a minute, these first 10 minutes are mine. I get to breathe here. I get to have my coffee here, let's just breathe. And that's step one of just noticing that your brain is having all of these thoughts and that you have control over them, okay?
That you get to decide which ones you wanna hold onto too, right? When I notice my brain does this too, okay, my brain likes to tell me things like, you're not capable, blah, blah, blah. But then I started noticing it and I kept noticing it over and over and over again. And I was like, no, I'm done. We're done with that thought. And now it doesn't bother me. It's like, oh, okay. My brain just does that sometimes. My brain likes to think that I'm not capable. And I'm like, this is such bs cuz I have all this evidence that I'm super capable. Look at all of this. And so give your brain equal airtime. If you start noticing that your brain has these repeat thoughts all the time that you don't like that aren't he serving you start consciously redirecting your brain and saying, wait a minute, I am capable.
No, I don't have to do everything on my to-do list today. No, I don't have to do everything in my inbox today.
Don't let hitting or NOT hitting your goal mean anything about you.
And then the third thing that I see, and I have been guilty of this too, which is why I know how it feels, is making, hitting the goal or not hitting the goal means something about you. Hey, whether it's what you're capable of. That's probably the biggest one is like, I'm not capable. That was what comes up for me. It might be something different for you. The goal is there to redirect your brain and to bring up all the crappy thoughts. This is what a goal is for. You wanna bring up all the crappy thoughts. I know, right? It's crazy. But once you bring them up, you get to start cleaning them up, okay? That's why I encourage setting a goal.
And so many of us are afraid of setting a numerical goal because then if we don't hit it, we're gonna feel horrible. But what if you set that goal and if you didn't hit it, it didn't mean anything about you. Like it, it's just a number. It's an arbitrary number. Like if you're building your business and you pick $350,000, it's an arbitrary number. It doesn't mean anything. We just picked it out of thin air. Same thing. $200,000 picked the number out of thin air. Why am I gonna make that number mean anything about me? It doesn't. So ask yourself if this sounds, if this is clicking with you, like ask yourself, am I making the number? Am I making the goal in achieving the goal or not achieving the goal mean something about me? And what is it? Okay? Cuz the evolution is in a goal.
The Purpose of a Goal is to Evolve Ourselves.
Okay? That's what a goal is for the the goal. This is what I believe a goal is there for us to evolve ourselves exponentially. It's there to clean up all of the doubts, right? They may still come, but then we start to notice them, right? This is something that I see a lot of in December, right? We stop moving towards our goal, we stop taking so much action. We have a lot of thoughts that prevent us from moving forward, right? Like, oh, you know, I'm just so tired or like, you know, I'll just start thinking about 20, 23. And you know, I, I'm just, I, whatever. I'm not gonna hit the goal this year anyway, so I'm not gonna focus out on it anymore. We do that because we're fearful, right? We're fearful of moving. Like if we, if we don't hit that goal, if we give up on it, it doesn't mean anything, right?
Oh, well I gave up on it, it's no big deal. But then if we actually did all the work and didn't hit our goal, then we'd make it mean something bad about ourselves, right? That we're not capable, that we can't do it. So I want you to really be, I'm like looking behind me cause I'm like smelling smoke. So hopefully the alarm doesn't go off <laugh>. So hopefully like you recognize this and then you begin to shift out of it and do that. Work on yourself. Do the self-coaching on yourself if you don't have a coach. Okay?
So the biggest struggles in 2022, I got a few few responses, so I wanna like respond to those.
But let me see what's going on in here in the q and a. Okay? Yeah. I think I'm hesitant to make a specific goal because I'm afraid of not hitting it.
And that thinking is, that is some kind of personal defeat. No, right? It's so interesting what our brain does that somehow there's something wrong with us that, you know, we were defeated. No, we just like decided that we were gonna expand ourselves. That we were gonna try for something amazing for ourselves. And how great would it be if we did hit the goal, right? But if we didn't, it would still be great because you learned so much about yourself, you learned so much about, you know, how you can hit the goal maybe the next year, right? That everything's a win. Everything. That's why it's so important to celebrate every little thing is because it takes our brain away from making things mean that we're not capable, that we're gonna be defeated, that, you know, there's something wrong. So wonderful. It's great awareness there. Okay? Okay.
Address Your Biggest Struggles Head On.
So some of the things that I got back for the biggest struggle of 2022, thinking I have to get it all done as soon as possible. Thinking I need to stay on top of everything, right? Whether it's emails, having dinner prepped, work at the office, working on a side business the work that piles up on the desk that isn't done yet. Moments of doubting myself and shifting out of that. Yeah, right? Like our brain is always gonna have doubts. That's how it's designed. It wants to create doubt because then you won't take action. But if we work out of that, we shift out of that, then that's, that's the evolution, right? Like when we start seeing it faster and faster and faster, then we get out of it and we start doing the work that's the most important to growing and the most important to hitting our goals.
So my biggest struggle in 2022, I had two of them. Compassion and play. I know my struggle and like the answer that I got, you know, from one of my clients here, it's like she knows this too. It's like I know that my struggle is not outside of me. It's not files, it's not paperwork, it's not client calls, it's not business strategy. That's never my struggle, right? It's always within me. There's, that's where the struggle always comes from. It's always up here, right? And it's always within my power to shift. That's why it's such great news if you start recognizing like, oh wait a minute, it's always me, right? Not in a blame kind of way, but in a like, oh, it's not what's outside of me. It's not the disorganized files on my desk, it's not like the stack of papers. It's how I am, how I'm being.
Address the Correct Problem. The Problem is Never Outside of You.
Oh, and then you can change, right? Then you can start making the shifts. So I have the same thoughts as you, right? Like I'll think sometimes I'll be like, oh that's such a mess. Like I need to clean that up or Wow, I've got a lot to do on my to-do list today. But because I notice that and I know that if I'm feeling any struggle or stress or overwhelm that it's going on in here, right? That there's something going on inside of me, it's creating it. I just remind myself of that and then I, you know, just like the fire alarm, I solve the correct problem, right? I don't just neaten what's going on on my desk or sometimes I do, right? Cause I know what's going on. But I actually look at, well why is it that my, like this was an example I got.
Why is it that my inbox is full right now and I'm feeling stress because the files aren't creating stress. It's what you're thinking about those files that's creating the stress, right? You're thinking I have to get it all done, I'm gonna be behind. And all of that is solvable, right? And once you understand that, you're like, oh, not a problem. Let me just prioritize.
So it's not a struggle for me, I just prioritize. But that's because I've practiced recognizing that oh that's not a problem. That's something I solve for.
So interesting when you just start solving for the right problem, struggling to find time for yourself. Yeah. So interesting, right? And I would ask myself like, where am I giving my time away and feeling resentful? Where am I giving my time away? And I know that's not the best use of my time, right?
Am I, am I checking social media a lot? Am I checking email a lot? Because time is there. Am I not asking for help? Like, is there somewhere I can ask for help to create that for myself? Cuz it's always asking yourself these questions. You always have the answers. That's what's amazing, right? Where am I not giving myself what I need? Where am I not asking myself what I need in this moment? Cultivating that sense of presence and recognizing like, oh, it's always within my power.
It's always within your power to change things.
It's always within my power to change things. So here's some questions I wanna pose to you. When you think about the struggle that you've had in 2022, right? How might this story that you have about your struggle be the best thing for your future self? Let's just sit with that for a moment. How might that be the best thing for your future self?
How is this going to change your capacity to have what you want when you face it head on, when you ask yourself those questions, how are you going to change yourself? How are you gonna change the dynamics of you versus versus or with the people around you, right? The work ideas, the tasks, all of the things that are your brain is telling you is between you and creating what you want. They're not gonna stop until you stop breathing.
Who Will You Need to Become to Hit Your Goal in 2023?
So who will you need to become to take yourself to the next level? What will, what stories are you gonna need to give up about what your problem is? And how are you gonna start looking at what the actual problem is? Like what's going on inside, right? Where can you begin solving for the correct problem? What stories are you gonna need to drop in 2023 so you can hit your goal?
Do you need to become the person who becomes impeccable with your time? And notice, I didn't say perfect cuz there's no such thing as perfect, but impeccable is really starting to notice when you sit at your desk and you feel overwhelmed and instead of doing the most important work you do, the busy work because that feels productive in the moment. Like, how are you going to need to change so you like get present and instead of doing the busy work shift into, wait a minute, wait a minute, I have control of what gets done today. I know I don't wanna do this, but I'm gonna sit here and I'm gonna do the most important work first. So that way at the end of the day, I'm not stressing out because that is one of the things I see happen the most. And being impeccable with your time, being present with your time and being honest with yourself and being in integrity with yourself is gonna help you so much more.
Are you gonna become the person who devotes time to redesigning the structure of your practice or how you run your business or your life?
So to the lawyer who said, you know, I struggle to find time for myself. That might be a great question for you is like, what is what, what is working in my life and what simply isn't? And how can I redesign some, if not all, of what's happening? And it might feel impossible right now. Know that it's possible. Just let your brain kind of sit in the space of possibility for yourself and how this might shift. Maybe you become the person who learns to prioritize or who laughs at yourself instead of taking everything as life or death, right? Maybe you become that person, a person who expands your ability to trust others and ask for help. Maybe you become a person who expands your ability to communicate your needs better with the people who work for you or, or the people in your family or your friends.
Maybe you're not asking your friends for help and maybe you are, you become the person who learns to prioritize and let go of the little stuff and say, okay, those other things don't matter. A person who prioritizes yourself and the quality of the life you want to experience. How is your quality of life? Have you checked in with yourself? Ask yourself what you need. If that resonated with you. So what's coming up for you? Like if you want coaching on anything that I've said today, let me know in the q and a if you wanna come on for coaching, okay? Or if you just wanna let me know in the q and a, like you have a question. I don't wanna come on for coaching. I just, I just want, I have this question. Can you address this? Let me know in the q and a.
Something New I'm Doing to Help You Create the Time You Need to Hit Your Goals.
Alright? And while you're doing that, I'm gonna give you some time to do that. I wanna share something that I am doing special starting this year. Hey, I've never done this before. I thought this would be a fun experiment in my business. I thought this would be a great way to serve lawyers who want some help and bring awareness of what coaching can do when it comes to prioritizing yourself. Really, you know, diving in deep with your schedule and how you think about the work that you're doing. And if you're a client, just ignore this little part, okay? You can answer the question in the q and a and then give you some coaching, but ignore this little part because you're already gonna get this. So this is what I'm doing. I am creating a scheduling strategy call and a, a scheduling strategy call is all about your schedule.
Okay? I'm actually gonna have my eyes on how you are planning your day, how you are planning your week, and we are gonna look at where you might be losing time. Hey, where you might be making your life a struggle where it doesn't have to be a struggle. And I did this work for myself, okay? I started, I don't know how long ago I started, I think I started about seven, seven years ago. And I started with transforming myself into a morning person. Okay? Like I wanted to build a business and I had no idea what I was doing. I had no guidance and I had, I was a full-time criminal prosecutor, so I was like, I have no time. But I did know that I hated waking up at 7, 7 30 in the morning, like after hitting snooze for an hour on my alarm and feeling like crap and feeling like I was rushing through my day.
And if this is you and you feel like you're rushing through your day and you wanna create more space in your life, this call might be for you.
What I did is I started to really break down what was going on in my calendar, how I was planning my day out. And I want to do that for you.
If you are feeling, you know, overwhelmed or stressed out about your day, you feel like you're rushing through your day, I wanna help you with that. And I want you to book a scheduling strategy call. So this is what happens. I ask you, right, for your schedule, all your thoughts about your schedule, all the things you want to accomplish that you're not doing right now, and also like what your goal is, right? And so then we can really take a look at your time together, right?
I'll look at it before we hit, get our call together so that I have a plan laid out and then I talk to you about it.
Okay? This is a fun experiment. I'm, I'm doing this because I wanna bring more awareness around coaching, but I also want you to have an easier schedule. So often we make our lives so hard and it doesn't have to be that way. And it, it might be simple tweaks that can be changed. So this is what I was gonna charge for this. Cause I was thinking like, how much am I gonna charge for this? This is gonna be a l this is gonna be a lot of work for me and depending on the person, right? And so I initially was gonna charge like, I don't know, like 1 27 or 1 25. I was trying to think of a number for it, but then I thought the purpose of this call is I really want to encourage lawyers to feel like they, they have some control.
It's an easy opportunity to connect with me. It's an easy opportunity to get some information about what's going on with their schedule and then also create an opportunity for them to learn what coaching is firsthand. And so instead of charging that, I decided I was gonna charge $37 and I think it's kind of a crazy number for probably the amount of work I'm doing in it. But I wanna be, I wanna give you something that really has tangible benefits and I wanna give you the opportunity to really see what coaching is like firsthand. So that's why I'm charging that. And I'm also like the, the strategy session call is gonna be an hour, okay? And that time is probably like, I'm gonna leave time in there if you wanna learn more about working with me. And what I'm gonna do before that call is I am gonna be looking at your schedule and everything that's going on in it and I'm gonna be like looking at the easy wins and then I'm gonna send you something before our call.
And then during our call we'll address whatever else is going on.
This is the first time I'm doing this. So it's kind of an experiment, but you're gonna be getting some really good stuff. You're gonna be getting some really good shifts that you can make within your own calendar just during our call.
It's gonna be fabulous. Okay? So this is how to do it, okay? And you can go to the website while we're on the call so you can kind of, I can kind of walk you through it as we go. You can go to https://dinacataldo.com/call c-a-l-l, right?
We're gonna do this all on Zoom, but I'm calling it a call. So https://dinacataldo.com/call. And when you go there on the website, you're gonna see it. If you open it up right now, it's gonna be a link to my calendar.
Now they open it up to my December calendar. What you're gonna actually have to do is click the little arrow to go into January because I've opened up a bunch of spots. So if you go into January, pick a date, I would suggest picking a date at least three days from now. Okay? That'll give me time to really look at your schedule for you to send me the schedule for me to do all of that. So give yourself enough time to do that.
Here's what happens after you scheduled your Scheduling Strategy Call with me.
So once you've picked your date, you're gonna click the red button and it's gonna take you to a page where you're gonna enter your name and you're gonna enter your email. Okay? Once you've done that, you're gonna hit your next page. Then the red button again, it's gonna take you to the next page, which is the payment page. Okay? So once you pay, what's gonna happen is you're gonna get an email, it's gonna give you like the zoom link, it's gonna give you all the good information.
I am going to get an email with your email address on it. Okay? So once I get that email address, I know that you've booked, I'm gonna send you a personal email and I'm gonna ask you for a couple things. So you can know this in advance. I'm gonna ask what your current schedule is, and if you don't have a schedule, that's okay, you can still do this call. I would be really curious about why you don't have a schedule. So I'm gonna ask you personalized questions and we might have a little bit of back and forth just so that we get some good stuff before our call. Cause I really wanna have that opportunity to send you something before our call that's going to give you kind of like a checklist, right? To make it really simple for you to make the shifts that you wanna make.
And then and then also you're gonna get a yeah, you're gonna get the personal email from me and then I'm gonna walk you through on our call. Yeah, you're gonna get the tactics right? You're gonna get all of the strategy, all of that good stuff. And then I'm gonna show you where your brain might be getting in the way. Cuz that's really what I help my clients with is the coaching, like all the mindset that goes into the, the work that we wanna do for ourselves and to hit our goal. Okay? So if that interests you, go to https://dinacataldo.com/call.
This is gonna be a really great way for you to make those small shifts.
And $37 is like nothing if you're gonna be getting back even an hour of time during your week, right? So just like I would really consider doing this if you're not doing this, I would ask why, because this is something that is like a major cha like a major shift and it might be just a couple tweaks that can change everything.
And if you can just devote that one hour and the $37 to making a shift that's going to create, I don't know, $250 in a week in your practice, why not do it? Right? Like, if you're charging two 50 an hour or even like 150 an hour, like you will see a huge shift from this small investment. So go to dina cataldo.com/call, book your call now, then I wanna see the times booked up. Make sure you're booking it out at least three days. And then that way I have an opportunity to, to look over your schedule, okay? And, and just like email me, we are gonna work, even if you don't have a schedule, even if you're just working like by the seat of your pants, we are gonna find ways to help you get time back because time is like the biggest asset I think that we have.
So often we just don't have the awareness around how we can make those small things better.
Okay? Awesome. Okay. So nobody wants coaching. Is that I have somebody, I think it was okay, I've struggled to find time for myself. Okay, so the coaching I would offer you if, if that was for coaching. I'm not sure if you still want coaching and you wanna, you know, just put on the q and a. I just have a question. Here's my question. Go ahead and do that. I'll just address this one thing. Cause I, I saw this a couple times come up in the q and a, struggling to find time for yourself.
For you if you're struggling to find time for yourself:
So if you are someone who struggles to find time for yourself, why do you think that is? Just answer that for yourself. Is it that you're attributing the fact that you don't have time to other people? Like the thoughts that come to mind for me is like other people are taking my time. I have too much work to do. Maybe you're thinking something like, I don't know how to spend my time effectively. Like what is the thought that comes up for you when you ask yourself like, why am I struggling with this? What comes up for you and why, why make it a struggle?
Hey, what is it that you want? Like if you had time for yourself, what would you do with that time? Because sometimes when we aren't conscious about what we would even do with that time, we just relegate it to the back of our head as if it doesn't matter and it totally matters. Okay? So just recognizing like, this is something that I do have control of, doesn't always feel like I have control of it, right? Like sometimes there are emergencies, there are health issues. Like I've experienced this myself. My mom was in the hospital for two weeks. I was freaking out, I thought she was gonna die. And I, I'm like, but I have to leave the hospital or I'm gonna go insane, right? And so I left the hospital and I was like, I am going to yoga and I went to yoga and I'm gonna get my hair done.
And I got my hair done and did I have guilt sometimes? Yeah, a little bit. But then I was like, but no, like I can't show up for her if I'm not showing up for myself. So if that's something that's happening for you, like ask yourself where can you be showing up for yourself more in your life? Like, that's something that I would ask myself. Cuz I, I felt the same way. Like it was seven years ago. I was, you know, a trial attorney. I wasn't creating space for myself. I had all of these dreams I wanted to go big on. And I'm like, I have no time. I'm like, how can I create time? That's what I had to ask myself. And then I got to work and I can help you with that, with this scheduling strategy call. So if that's something you want help with, I highly encourage you to book a call with me.
Go to https://dinacataldo.com/call, book a call with me and we will help you find that time. Okay? So I have another I have some more here.
For you if you panic when you have tasks outside your comfort zone:
Okay, so one of you says, I start panicking each time I get a task that is not within my comfort zone and I wanna work and my comfort zone all the time. Yeah, I mean that's really normal. Okay. I want you to know that's a hundred percent normal because what we do, our brain does, cuz we have two parts of our brain, right? We have a primal part of our brain. It's not evolved, right? It was, it was built for survival. It was not built to go after uncomfortable goals. It wants to stay comfortable, it wants to conserve energy. It does not want to be uncomfortable. It wants to sit on the couch and eat donuts and watch Netflix.
Okay? That's what my primal brain wants to do. But I then get into the prefrontal cortex, which is the more evolved part of our brain. It's kind of like on top of our primal brain. So we still have all the reactions, but then we got this great evolved brain that then we can tap into. So when we feel uncomfortable, right? Like this is what my brain does. So, you know, I'll be like, oh gosh, it's dinnertime. What do I wanna eat? I just wanna eat potatoes or like some carbohydrates. I just wanna have potato chips and sour cream. I mean, yeah, I may sound gross, but yeah, I really, that's what my primal brain wants. It's comfort food. But then I go to my primo brain and I'm like, okay, but I know a salad's really good for me. And so I could sometimes wind myself into a salad.
But then when I eat the salad, I'm like, I hate this salad. It's the worst. I don't like salad, but I'm eating the salad. Cause my pri I'm still like kicking in my prefrontal cortex. Like just eat the salad. And then at the end I'm like, I'm so glad I chose a sha a salad. Like I just feel better about myself. My body feels better. It's amazing. I might have winded the whole time, but you know what? I feel so much better about myself that I ate that. Right? Same thing thing goes, when we're going after a goal, we're gonna feel uncomfortable. We're gonna s we're gonna look at our calendar, we're gonna have this really great ambitious calendar. We're gonna sit down and we're gonna look at it and we're gonna be like, I don't wanna do that. Our brain, our primal brain does not wanna do that.
It's up to us to be like, I don't wanna do that and I'm gonna do that. And then we break it down into the smallest parts. Okay? So whatever your project, pick your, pick your poison, the thing that your brain does not want to do the most. You sit down, you look at it, break it down into the tiniest parts possible. Just write a list. Step one, what are the tiniest parts possible here? Maybe it's make a phone call. Do 15 minutes of research. You know, let me call a, call a friend, call another lawyer, right? Whatever it is, break that task down into the tiniest parts possible and then just get your brain on board with the first thing you need to do. It's like, I'm just gonna do that one thing. Cuz sometimes when we think about it as a huge project, our brain has a really hard time getting on board.
Kind of like when you go to the gym, your brain's like, I don't wanna go to the gym. But if you're just like, okay, I, if I just put on my tennis shoes, I'm just gonna put on my tennis shoes. I don't even have to go to the gym. I'm just gonna put on my tennis shoes. All right, I'm just gonna put on a sweatshirt. Okay, I'm just gonna get the keys. All right, I'm just gonna go to the car. Okay, I'm just gonna get drive to the gym. Like, you're not even committing to go to the gym, you're just committing to the one little step. It helps so much more in calming our mind. So that's something that you can try. But being uncomfortable is a practice and feeling what's going on inside as a practice. And then the coaching that you do on yourself or you do with a coach is really about like, what's going on in your brain?
Okay, what's happening there?
How can we calm the brain down so that you can take that next step?
Yeah, taking care of an aging parent and trying to run a solo law practice, it does feel overwhelming. Of course it does, right? And it's so important because of that, to prioritize time for yourself. And you might feel guilty sometimes and that's okay. But when you start taking care of yourself and recognizing like, oh wait a minute, I can take 30 minutes to myself and the world's not gonna fall apart. And sometimes you're gonna have really big plans for your week, right? You're gonna have hearings scheduled, you're gonna have client calls scheduled and something's gonna come up with your parent and you are gonna be like, okay, well I guess they take priority and I'm gonna, I, and people are gonna understand, like those are the things I always remind myself of.
People will understand this is my priority. The world is not falling apart. I will figure it out. I can ask for help. Like those are some things that I tell myself, but of course it's gonna feel overwhelming. And then it's up to us to really like take some breaths, remind ourselves that we have control over this and that we can start doing things like taking action in a way that is present to our needs and is present to you know, what we wanna accomplish. Cuz you can do both. I mean sometimes they can't happen at the exact same time, but you can be present to your needs and start taking care of yourself much more effectively when you start to notice what's going on in your mind and recognizing that you know, you do have some control and you do have, you likely have friends that you can reach out to for support.
You know, that can help you when you need it. Okay. Ah, this is so wonderful. I think I've answered everybody's questions. Thank you so much for being here. This was a lot of fun. I am gonna send out a replay so that you can go through, you can answer all of those questions for yourself. You can hear some of this coaching back. Highly encourage you. Go to dina cataldo.com/call. Set up a scheduling strategy call with me. We will help you create more space for what you wanna create in 2023. It's so essential for us to really be intentional about where we're spending our time and are we spending our time on the most impactful things. I can help you figure that out in our call together. Alright, my friend, I hope you have a fabulous New Year's Eve. Create some play and all the best to you in 2023. All right, so much love to you. Bye.