#234: Focus Errors

Let's talk about Focus Errors

A couple years ago a client gave me a testimonial, and she said, “Dina helps me focus on what I CAN do instead of focusing on what I CAN’T.”

This was such a perfect way to describe what coaching is, and I want to tell you why.

When clients come to me, they have focus errors. Over the years they’ve created the habit of focusing on what HASN’T happened yet instead of what WILL happen.

Another way of saying this is that they focus on past failures instead of future successes.

Or they focus on the results they HAVE versus the results they WANT.

In this episode, you’ll learn 1) what a Focus Error is, 2) a few of the most common Focus Errors I see, and 3) how you can begin shifting your focus to get the result you want.

Before we jump in, I want to invite you to download the Busy Lawyer’s Guide. I’ve just updated it, and I know when you implement what I share in this Guide you’ll get 10 hours back. This is a Guide I’ve been tweaking for the last two years. It started with what worked for me, and I’ve been updating it with what I see working time and again for my clients.

I highly recommend downloading this guide if you find yourself feeling anxious or overwhelmed with your case load.

You can download it at https://dinacataldo.com/busylawyer

That’s https://dinacataldo.com/busylawyer

Alright, let’s jump into this episode.

A thought is a sentence in our brain telling us where to focus.

Every thought we have gives us a focus.

When we focus our energy in a direction, that determines the result we get.

Imagine a tree leaning in one direction. It’s always leaning towards the sun. It automatically follows what’s giving it nourishment. Our thoughts nourish our results.

A Focus Error is a thought that’s creating an unproductive focus meaning it will not give us the result we want.

Focus is a brain-based habit.

Which is good news because that means once you understand how your brain works, you can change this habit.

What you need to know is this:

Our brains are focused on 3 things automatically:

1 – avoiding pain

2 – seeking pleasure/comfort

3 – conserving energy

Logically we may tell ourselves we should do the things we know are good things to do to grow our business or to manage our time, but we don’t always do them.

The reason is because the primal urges will always win our until you learn how to manage them.

Willpower is finite, so it’s not going to be long-lasting.

Learning how to coach your own brain is more sustainable and feels a lot better.

When we learn how to coach our brain, it’s like changing the direction of the sun to point the tree where we want it to go.

And when we try to willpower ourselves or logic ourselves into doing something, it doesn’t always stick. The limbic brain wants what it wants when it wants it.

Think of the limbic part of your brain as a toddler and the more evolved part of the brain — the prefrontal cortex — as the adult. We’ve got to train the adult to learn HOW to communicate with the limbic brain.

Know this ahead of time:

— Our brain will never want to do things that feel uncomfortable or new

— It will always delay the hard stuff

— It’ll always seek the path of least resistance (which is the habit already established) even if it’s not helpful

It’s up to us to manage where we focus our brain because no one can do it for us.

I help my clients with their Focus Errors, and there’s a few I see over and over again I want to share with you here.

1) how they approach growing their business

I had a lawyer come to me and said she tried a lead magnet for 4 months. People responded but they weren’t the kinds of clients she wanted. If you’re not familiar with a lead magnet, it’s a free resource that you create that someone can give you their email address for in return for that resource. Just like the Busy Lawyer’s Guide I mentioned earlier.

When she told me this I knew she was focused on what hadn’t happened yet versus what she wanted to happen because she gave up on it. 

Her brain thought, “It didn’t work.” But that’s because she was focussed on NOT getting the result she wanted. When we focus on NOT having the result we want, we aren’t able to take action to get the result we DO want.

When our brains focus on the result we intend to create, our actions change.

We don’t think about what’s not working. We look at what IS working and make tweaks like a scientist tweaks an experiment.

This is what this would look like in the case of a lead magnet.

We get curious.

What do we know?

We know the lead magnet works because it attracted people to it.

We also know that it didn’t attract the kind of people that she wanted, so we can ask questions:

What’s the title? Why might it have appealed to people she didn’t want to attract? What title might be attractive to her idea client?

What channel was it promoted on? Is that where her ideal customers spend time?

What was the promise of the lead magnet? Was it what her ideal client would want? Did it use key words that would attract her ideal client?

Once you answer these questions and make hypothesis about what may improve it, you put the lead magnet back out into the world and collect more data. Then you tweak and put back out, etc. 

But we can’t get into scientist mode when we give up. When we don’t change the Focus Error, we can’t change our focus to get the result we want.

2) how they approach new ideas

One of my clients decided in 2023 she’s going to work for one month remotely at a beach house. This sounds like fun for her, and she wants to try it.

When this topic came up in session, I could tell her brain had a Focus Error. It was focused on the result she HADN’T created yet instead of the result she WOULD create. In other words she was focused on having never done it before.

It was something new for her, so it makes sense that her brain would look for data telling her whether it was possible. It had no data that it was possible, so it didn’t want to think about the specifics. Remember, our brain will put off hard things. Anything new and requires thinking is considered hard.

She said, “I’m not sure how I’m going to do it. I’ll have to think about it.”

One of the things I love doing when my clients say something like, “I don’t know, I’ll have to think about it,” is that I get the opportunity in our sessions to refocus their brain and say, “Yeah, let’s think about it now. Tell me what you’re thinking.” 

We’ve got to think about the details to achieve our dreams, and I’m there to help you with that when your brain has a Focus Error.

And when her brain stalled, I was there with questions to help pull the answers out of her. 

Notice I didn’t say I GAVE her the answers. I’m there to help her think through her problem so SHE can solve for it NOT to tell her what to do.

Her indecision came down to focusing on how overwhelming it seemed to plan this. But that came from her brain’s default focus of avoiding pain. Because she was worried that something would come up that she wouldn’t be able to handle if she was working remotely and that would feel overwhelming. We talked through that, and she realized that was something she could figure out by contacting clients and the court ahead of time.

Once I asked her a few more questions, she outlined the steps for herself and it was super easy. 1) look at her calendar and pick dates, 2) look at places, 3) rent place, 4) look at equipment she needed to work remotely, 5) communicate with clients and court as needed

Overcoming the Focus Error helped her move from believing this would be overwhelming to creating 5 easy steps for her to implement her plan.

3) how they approach time management

When clients come to me overwhelmed with their case load, it’s always because of a Focus Error. They’re focused on how much time they DON’T have versus focused on how much time they HAVE. They’re focused on the OVERWHELM instead of focusing on the result they WANT to create with the time they have.

When we have this Focus Error, we can’t be focused on problem-solving. Our brain is so preoccupied with the problem that it can’t see the solutions available. It just freezes up. That’s why if you’re overwhelmed you may find yourself procrastinating or having that deer in the headlights look when you get to your desk.

I help my clients refocus on the result they want: to make their lives easier. I ask them questions to stimulate the problem-solving part of their brain.

When they focus on the result they want to create, they feel more calm. Then they can start taking action towards that result. They get more focused. They prioritize better. 

But until they change their focus, they can’t do it. They’re stuck.

How do you know you have a Focus Error and how do you change that focus?

If you don’t have the result you want, chances are good you have a Focus Error.

The good news is, your focus doesn’t have to be perfect for you to make progress towards your goal. This isn’t a practice that requires perfection. It just takes noticing what’s happening in your brain more and more, so you catch it faster and faster.

It’s a sure sign if you feel overwhelmed, stressed, frustrated, you’re having a Focus Error.

And that’s okay.

Breaking Down the Steps

Step one is just to notice it. 

Step two is to get curious. What thought is creating the feeling? That thought is your focus right now. 

Step three is to be kind to yourself. Remind yourself that no one teaches us this in school. You may be just now learning that your thoughts create the results you have in your life. Now you get to practice something brand new.

Step four is to ask yourself, “If you had the result you wanted, what might you DO differently? Would you be studying the lead magnet like a scientist or asking yourself how you CAN accomplish what you want?”

Focus your brain on what IS possible instead of listening to your brain when it tells you it’s NOT  possible, and you’ll get much better insight into your next steps.

Book a Strategy Session

If you enjoyed this podcast, I invite you to book a Strategy Session with me.

We’ll take a look at what Focus Errors you might be having right now when it comes to your practice, your calendar, and your goals. 

Strategy Sessions are one of my favorite things to do because I get to introduce lawyers to coaching. A lot of lawyers have never heard of coaching before, so I get an opportunity to show them what it’s about. 

It’s also a great opportunity to get to know you.

So if you’ve been thinking about booking a Strategy Session with me, this is the perfect time to do it.

You can book one at https://dinacataldo.com/strategysession

That’s https://dinacataldo.com/strategysession

Looking forward to talking to you.

Alright my friend. I will talk to you again next week.

Bye.