#360: Dissolving Distractions

Read this episode: Dissolving Distractions

Ever feel like you're constantly fighting distractions? You're not alone.

Distractions cost you big time – not just in billables and client satisfaction, but in your overall life satisfaction. There's a phrase that goes something like: “If you don't make your priorities and stick to them, somebody else will make those priorities for you.”

You don't want someone or something else deciding what you can accomplish with your one beautiful life.

But here's the thing – these distractions aren't happening because you're “not disciplined enough” (which is a mistake many people make, then beat themselves up about). They happen because you haven't addressed the root causes.

Let's talk about how to disentangle yourself from distractions and reclaim your focus.

Distractions Are a Choice (Even When It Doesn't Feel Like It)

I know it doesn't feel like a choice in the moment, but everything we do is a choice – whether we say yes to something or no.

When we're distracted, it feels like something has stepped into our world and taken our attention. And there's a good reason for this – there's a lot of money spent on capturing our attention:

• News outlets use carefully chosen words to keep us hooked in endless news cycles
• Social media platforms are designed to keep our eyeballs glued to them
• Websites create infinite scroll experiences to maximize ad revenue

These companies are literally spending millions to steal your attention. So if you feel like your attention is being stolen, you're not imagining things.

But every moment, we have a choice to disentangle ourselves from whatever distraction we're involved in.

Why It's So Hard to Break Free from Distractions

One of the main reasons it's difficult to disentangle ourselves from distractions is that our brain wants to stay in those old, comfortable patterns.

We may be uncomfortable long-term because we're not accomplishing what we want in our practice or life, but our subconscious wants to stay rooted in the same old patterns – even if they don't serve us – because they feel comfortably uncomfortable.

Tony Robbins gave an amazing example that illustrates this perfectly: Have you ever been in a relationship that you knew was bad for you, but you stayed in it way too long?

If you're nodding, then you know how difficult it is to disentangle yourself from old ways of being.

The same applies to other areas of your life:

• Have you kept discounting your rates even though you know you're undercutting your revenue goals?
• Have you wanted to become an attorney who bills contemporaneously but can't seem to make the change?

These are all examples of staying with old familiar comforts, even when they're not serving you.

What Distractions Really Look Like

A distraction is really a way to numb yourself emotionally. You're putting off what your higher self has identified as most important.

Distractions often stem from deeper feelings like:

• Fear of failure
• Imposter syndrome
• Feeling like you're not enough or not capable
• Fear of disappointing others
• Not accomplishing enough

Overcoming distractions requires both paying attention to these feelings AND releasing them. If you don't address these root causes, you can't see the distractions and move away from them.

Common Distractions That Steal Your Time

The lawyers I talk to get distracted by:

• Playing games on their computer or phone
• Scrolling social media
• Reading news (often “hate scrolling” or “doom scrolling”)
• Overeating, drinking, or spending
• Overchecking email
• Working on footers of documents instead of substance
• Getting another cup of coffee
• Cleaning or baking
• Over-exercising
• Staying up late watching TV
• Beating themselves up (yes, this is a distraction too!)
• Ruminating on past events

The worst part? We've been socialized to believe many of these distractions are necessary, so we rationalize these behaviors.

Take watching the news, for example. There's a difference between being a well-informed citizen (which requires just awareness of what's happening) and overindulging in news, especially “hate scrolling” about people or topics you've already decided you don't support.

Another socially acceptable distraction is work itself. In our society, the more you work, the better a person you're perceived to be. But we can use work to distract ourselves from the real work of being human – being present with ourselves and learning who we are.

Breaking the Distraction Loop

When you find yourself in a perpetual distraction loop (distracting yourself, getting some work done, distracting yourself again), here's what to do:

1. Notice it. Awareness is the first key.
2. Pause. Close your eyes and take three breaths.
3. Question yourself. Ask: “Is this really what I want to be doing?”
4. Remember your priorities. Remind yourself of the task you set out to do. Go back to your calendar and look at it.
5. Feel your feelings. If you still can't focus and start getting frustrated, pause and feel it. Let yourself complain to yourself (not to others – that's another distraction).
6. Take one step. Break down your project and take just one step at a time.

Your Challenge This Week

I challenge you to pick ONE distraction this week and practice eliminating it. Just this week.

Journal about:

• How you felt when you noticed the distraction
• What emotion was present (anxiety, overwhelm, etc.)
• How the distraction impacted your productivity
• What happened when you redirected your focus

Remember, distraction is a choice – a moment-by-moment choice. You notice yourself checking email, and you can pause. You notice yourself scrolling, and you can pause. That's how you know it's a choice.

Change is hard to do alone, but you don't have to do it alone. Keep showing up for yourself time and again. As you practice, you'll become better at recognizing and releasing distractions. You'll accomplish more, feel better about yourself, and become more confident in your work.

The distractions won't disappear completely – we live in a distracting world. But you can take charge of your distractions and make decisions about the priorities you want in your life. That's how you'll find peace, take control of your life, and accomplish what you want in this world.

Ready to take back your focus? Download my Time Peace workbook at dinacataldo.com/timepiece and let's start creating more peace in your practice.

💖

Dina