Feel stuck or like it's hard to change your old habits? In this episode, you'll learn how to take charge of your experience of life and create one that feels more aligned with what you really want.
I’ll share how I’ve navigated changes in my own life and the mindset shifts that have made the biggest difference. Whether it’s your practice, your relationships, or your personal goals, it all comes down to making intentional choices and being willing to try something different.
What You'll Learn:
- What it means to take ownership of your experience
- The importance of non-attachment and flexibility
- How to know if you're attached to your experience and making life harder than it needs to be
If you want to have more power over the experiences you're having in your life, listen in.
RESOURCES
Read this episode: Taking Charge of Your Experience
Are you feeling stuck in your law practice or life? That sense of being trapped might be coming from your attachments to how things “should” be.
As lawyers, we're experts at getting in our own way. We have this strong desire for something—growing our practice, improving relationships, or achieving personal goals—yet we remain stuck because we're clinging to old patterns, beliefs, and identities.
The Root of All Suffering
Buddha said the root of all suffering is attachment, and I've found this to be profoundly true in my own life. The places where I've struggled most are exactly where I'm holding on too tightly to expectations of how things “should” be.
Recently, I realized I had an attachment to social media. It didn't feel fun or connecting, but I had all these preconceived notions about what it was supposed to look like. I decided to take control of my experience by completely flipping my approach—making a 90-day commitment to simply answer people's questions and connect authentically, without attachment to outcomes.
Past vs. Present Attachments
Many of us are attached to our past experiences:
“In the past, I haven't been able to manage my caseload…” “In the past, I haven't been able to grow my practice…”
This attachment to past failures creates a self-fulfilling prophecy. Instead, we need to release these limitations and say, “I'm going to take control of my experience. I'm going to take one small step in the direction I want.”
Goals Without Attachment
There's a delicate balance between having goals and attachment to those goals. If you're attached to a billable hour target or revenue goal, you'll likely feel anxious, pressured, and overwhelmed.
The key is to release the attachment while maintaining the desire. You can say, “Yes, I will create this for myself, but I'm going to figure out how to do it without killing myself, without all the negativity and drama.”
This means pausing, regrouping, and refocusing on what truly matters. It means asking, “What are my priorities? What do I need to accomplish today?”
Being Present While Creating Your Future
I'm currently in the process of moving to Sedona. I had so many attachments—to the timeline, to what the house should look like, to the price. I also had attachments to my current home that I love.
The breakthrough came when I recognized these attachments were creating unnecessary struggle. I took control of my experience by:
- Making a clear decision aligned with my desires
- Releasing attachment to how it “should” unfold
- Staying present and appreciating my current experience
- Taking aligned action without emotional struggle
Identity Attachments
Some of the strongest attachments we have are to our identities. When I left my role as a deputy district attorney to become a life coach, I struggled immensely because I was attached to my identity as a lawyer. My ego was wrapped up in how people treated me differently when they knew I was an attorney.
This attachment created unnecessary pain and suffering. I dragged my feet on doing the work I knew I wanted to do because I was afraid of what people would think.
Breaking Free
The invitation I extend to you is this: Look into your life and ask:
- Where are you feeling aggravation?
- What are you attached to—experiences, things, people, identities?
- How is that attachment impacting your experience?
- What do you need to release to create the experience you truly want?
Then, take one small step forward. You don't have to do it all at once.
When we have desires pulling us forward but release our attachments to how they must unfold, everything becomes easier. We tap into the desire without the suffering, and we take control of our experience.
What's one attachment you're ready to release today?
💖
Dina