Transcript: Choosing to Believe with Dina Cataldo
Hello there, my friend. I hope you're having a lovely week.
At the end of this podcast, I want to offer you 5 powerful questions to ask yourself that can change everything for you, so listen all the way to the end.
I want to offer you a way of thinking about what you want that may open you up to possibility.
It was a way that I was blind to even though I'd done it before in different contexts.
For example, I chose to believe that college was important. Everyone said it was, so I did it.
I chose to believe getting into the best schools was important, so I did my best to get into the best schools I could no matter the cost.
I chose to believe that law school would get me the job I wanted after I was done.
We do this all the time without realizing it.
We choose to believe our partner loves us.
We choose to believe that the sun is going to rise each morning.
I want to offer to you that we are always choosing to believe something.
The choice may be helpful or hurtful.
I love choosing to believe that the sun will come up tomorrow. It makes my life easy. I'm not thinking about how it may not come up tomorrow. It's a great choice for me to believe that. It serves my long-term goals.
Because when I make the choice to believe it, it makes other choices easier for me. I make plans because I assume it's going to come up. I promote my podcast and my coaching program instead of choosing to hide in a closet. I go out and help people instead of worrying about what will happen if the sun doesn't come up.
Here's what we do as humans. Even if a choice isn't getting us what we want, we keep making the same choice because we don't believe we have a choice.
We choose our old life because it's scary to choose a new life.
We choose to believe what other lawyers say about what it means to be a lawyer instead of defining what it means to us to be a lawyer.
We choose to believe that other lawyers have it figured out.
You may not say these things out loud, but you're also not saying out loud that you believe the sun will come up tomorrow. It's assumed. It's never addressed.
I want to tell you that you have a choice, and if you're choosing to believe you can't change or that being a lawyer means being stressed out and overwhelmed and putting out fires constantly, that's your choice.
Let me tell you a little story about me 11 years ago.
I was working all the time as a criminal prosecutor. Nights. Week-ends. I believed that was what it meant to be a lawyer. I believed that's what it took to prove myself. I believed that I just needed to stick it out. Instead of believing that the people leading my team were poor leaders, I believed that there was something wrong with me.
It didn't strike me that I had a choice to believe anything differently until I was diagnosed with breast cancer at 29, and chemo seemed like a vacation from practicing the law.
When I went through that, I saw that things could be different.
There WAS a path where I didn't have to feel stressed and overwhelmed.
As fun as chemo was, it couldn't just be a choice between that and practicing law.
There had to be another way.
I had to choose to believe there was another way even though I didn't know what it was yet.
When I believed there was another way, I could allow myself to figure it out.
Being the over-achiever I am (and you probably are too), I wanted to find a way to practice law AND follow my dream of starting a business.
I wanted it all. I didn't care if there were obstacles. I chose to believe there was another way, and that I would find it.
There were lots of obstacles: being a full-time lawyer, procrastination, self-doubt, you name it!
All that mattered was that I believed there was a way to have what I wanted, and that I could find it.
I had to choose that belief over and over again.
Choosing that belief led me to try lots of things and learn and grow and expand my capabilities to manage my time, my mind, and my business.
Here are the 5 powerful questions I told you I'd give you.
I love this quote from Tony Robbins: “The quality of our questions determines the quality of our life.” I've found that's 100% true, so really take the time to answer these questions.
1. If you believed in yourself completely, what choices would you make differently?
2. If you made those choices, how would your life be different? How would you feel? Think about yourself? Do differently?
3. What beliefs are you holding onto that stand between you and making those choices? About yourself? About what's possible for you?
4. What are you giving up by holding onto those beliefs?
5. Do you recognize that holding onto those beliefs is a choice and that you're deciding to give up what you want? You're deciding it's more valuable to you to hold onto your old beliefs than change.
These are questions that I intend to come back to over and over again for myself. It's important to reevaluate what we believe about ourselves because we're always going to find layers. We're like onions. There's always another layer to peel back and uncover something new about what we're capable of. We just beed to choose to believe that we can do it.
Hiring a coach fans the flames of your belief in yourself.
Procrastination and self-doubt actually douse the flames of belief, which is why it felt so hard for me to get traction getting what I want.
Then you have to start over to build up your belief again.
I needed a coach to help me fan the flames of my belief and help me continue to expand what I was capable of. If you don't have a mindset coach who can help you work through the procrastination, self-doubt and other habits that prevent you from keeping the flames going, it takes a long time to get what you want.
Instead of having a tiny spark that goes out at the slightest gust of wind, I help my clients build the fire they have for what they want.
I hold the belief for them even when they can't.
I show them where they're making progress and how they can make even more powerful decisions for themselves.
Every day we make decisions. Decisions to stay where we are or to expand what we're capable of.
If you're the kind of lawyer who's ready to expand your capabilities, I'm here for you.
Book a call with me.
You are ready. There's no better time than now.
You can start working with me by going to dinacataldo.com/strategysession
Just sign up for a call.
So often we overthink what we want.
Stop overthinking and choose to believe in yourself no matter what.
Believe that you're exactly where you're supposed to be.
Alright my friend.
I will talk to you next week.